I'm A Silly Mami: How Neighborly Are You?   

Friday, November 4, 2011

How Neighborly Are You?

I remember growing up how neighbors looked out for each other. Even if you really didn’t like each other that much you still looked out for each other especially when your neighbors are elderly.  But that doesn’t always seem the case nowadays.

The snow storm that arrived at the end of October proved to be quite the storm. A week later there are still thousands without power. Today on the news I heard about an 86 year women who was found dead in her home possibly by hypothermia. Her son found her wrapped in blankets. I cannot stop thinking about her. Why did her son not bring her home with him? I believe the news also said that he was fighting cancer but regardless, why was she home alone?  Why didn’t her neighbors check in on her to see if she was ok? I really don’t understand. How difficult is it to walk across the street or walk next door and check in on your neighbors?

We are very lucky to have a few nice neighbors. One of our neighbors is a retired cop and his wife is a teacher. We help each other out a lot and if either of us need anything we are always there for each other. I’ve watched their dog many times when they went away or stayed out late and needed to feed her and take her out. When I had my baby and my husband was travelling they didn’t hesitate to snow blow my driveway. My neighbor across the street would come over and feed my dogs if I needed her too. She home schools her kids so if we needed something she didn’t hesitate to help and I was there for her when she went on vacation. There are about 5 homes that look out for each other. We bring the mail and newspapers in if someone is away, feed the cats when they are on vacation and make the house look lived in, help mow each others lawn if needed. That is what neighbors are for.

During the storm last week, we, like so many thousands lost power. Hubby went out that morning in search of coffee and food. Hubby brought back extra coffee for our neighbor and he was so grateful for that cup of coffee. Today we finally started clearing the trees that snapped off during the storm and our neighbor loaded up his truck and brought everything to the dump for us – because that is what neighbors do.

But you know what has been annoying the hell out of me is that down the street there is someone we talk to all the time. We’ve known them since we moved into the neighborhood 9 years ago. Their girls were 5 & 7 and I’ve hung out over there many times and they’ve come to our house many times. The girls would play in the muck in my back yard. My husband has helped them out so many times with their computer issues, network connections, rebuilding their laptop, we gave them an all-in-one printer/fax/copier, clothes for the girls, etc you get the idea – we’ve done a lot of shit for them. Anyway they have a generator that they were using since they lost power. I was texting with her and she had asked me if I was home and I told her I was home alone with my dogs while hubby was at his parents with Buggy and not once during the conversation did she even ask me over for a cup of coffee or a hey do you want to come over for a bit and get warm – not even once. They have one of those electric fireplaces so I know she was using it to warm up the house.  That shit really pisses me off that you know someone is sitting in their house with no heat and you don’t even offer them an invite to your warm house. I would never ever do that to someone. Did she think that if she invited me I would ask to bring my dogs – really?  It wasn’t freezing yet in the house but bloody hell – it was cold! My dogs were fine – I was cold!  She kept telling me what the news was saying about the power being restored. Bitch – nothing like rubbing it in. That just totally left a sour taste in my mouth. I will always help anyone as long as I’m able to because that’s what neighbors do but don’t shit on me. If that was me with the power I would have offered to make a pot of coffee and snacks or sandwiches and bring it over or have them over – whatever they wanted to do.  Need to take a shower, come over I have two bathroom, whatever I can do to help.

Today I made 3 pots of coffee – THREE because we are rebuilding our front porch and a friend of ours is working very hard to try and get this done before any more crappy weather arrives. I also fixed him lunch and made sure that he had plenty of drinks on hand – because that is how we are, if you are working on our house or doing something for us you will be fed and have plenty to drink.

What about you? Do you have great neighbors? How do you get along with them?


  1. You know, I've noticed that too. 

    I grew up in a neighborhood that was VERY involved with each other. They know each other, and if someone is sick, EVERYONE pitches in. It's still like that, and my parents still live there. It's awesome. I still love the neighborhood.

    Since I married and moved out of there, I lived in a college dorm, which, while there was a severe lack of privacy, it wasn't really neighborly, and I lived in 2 different military neighborhoods. One of them (in New Jersey) was a lot like my mom's neighborhood and I loved it, and the other (Alabama) was terrible, no one cared about anyone else, unless you were already IN a circle, and I cried every day I was there (a year.) 

    Now I"m in a neighborhood about an hour from my moms and while people do their duty to check on people (mostly through church requirements and positions) it's friendly, but not that same kind of neighborly like my moms. No cookies at christmas, no caroling, no summertime swimming with kids up and down the street - no one stops by without a reason. You know. We even took the kids to my mom's neighborhood for trick or treating this year because no one here does it. I miss that. I hope we move into a great neighborhood next time. 

    Thanks for the article

  2. Altho my dad was transferred many times until I was 13, we always lived in close neighborhoods. That can be great and if yer a mischievous kid, not so great :) But I lived for 9 years to the day, raised two girls there til they were 9 and 10, in an Iowa small town, and it was the most nasty, xenophobic place I have ever lived in. I called it "The Village of the Damned." Yes, there were good people there and I knew most of them, but the attitude of the town was, "You aren't from here." I owned a big, historic house, (on which I spent over 40K in renovations) a good business, paid taxes and had a child there, but was never accepted totally. The wife of a city councilman sat in my kitchen and complained, "All you outsiders just come in and take over our town. You people don't belong on all these community boards, and you certainly don't belong in this house!" She then offered me 5k over what I paid for the house, said she'd get a check to me in 24 hours and I had 2 days to "get the hell out of this place, you don't belong here!"

    When I announced that we were selling our business and moving to warmer climes, some actually said to my face, "Good riddance, 4 fewer outsiders here now!" But the kind, gentle ones sighed, "WHY does this town run out all the good people, the ones who do so much for our community? You made such a difference and this place won't be the same..."

    I now live in a small city in Florida, where most citizens are "from somewhere else," and I love it! My neighbors are kind, caring people who watch out for each other, even the old lady who hates cats! My cat in particular, but when Cat escapes, she's the first one to tell me, "Can't stand that thing, but I don't want it hit by a car, either!" and smiles.

  3. Wow, That's really nice...We have a little but of that but not to that extent...I am here from MBS and i have to say, what a great button! I am a new follower, Pinkim from TrulySimplyPink

  4. I miss the days of close neighbors. We have been lucky so far with the last two places we have lived and have had good neighbors. 

    It's hard for some people to see beyond the walls of their own life and it's so sad. But I believe that the more we do the more we influence others to do also.

    Thanks for a great post. 

  5. Hi Felicia,

    Thanks for stopping by. These days finding a nice house with a good neighborhood just doesn't seem enough anymore. You have to make sure your neighbors aren't totally crazy - lol!

  6. Hi Kim,

    Thanks for following. Your button is adorable as well. Following you back. 

  7. hi Lucy,

    Wow - that place does sound like Village of the Damned! The towns people should have formed a mutiny and ran the bad seed out-LOL!  Sounds like it could have been pretty scary. Glad that you did get out and love where you are. That makes a huge difference. Thanks for stopping by.

  8. Hi Brae,

    Sounds like your parents live in a great place.  I hope the next time we move we find a neighborhood like your mom's too. That makes such a huge difference. Glad you got to move out of those other neighborhoods!

  9. When I was growing up in my neighborhood, my family and I were very close with our neighbors. As we got older, we grew apart from some of our neighbors. I was sad, but I guess that's how life goes sometimes. Thanks for joining the weekend blog hop! I'm following you back! :)

  10. Great site! Thanks for joining my blog hop.  I agree.  I only know a handful of my neighbors, such a difference from when I was growing up.  You've inspired me to get out of my shell more in my new neighborhood.

  11. Hi Lindsay,

    Thanks for stopping by. It is sad sometimes how things like that change. It does happen, as life does but somethings you just wish they could stay the same. 

  12. Hi Erica,

    Thanks for the feedback! I appreciate it. You should def try it. You might realize you have more in common and at least you can say you tried. 


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